FOUR FOR FRIDAY 18: SPIRITUALITY
If you aren't grateful for what you already have, what makes you think you'll be happy with more?
Spirituality can sometimes seem dense and complex, but at its core, it can also be described in the simplest terms. What allows you to connect to yourself? Your deep self... the small voice within you. And what allows that voice to live through you?
1. Commitment to Consistency
Recently, I decided to get into archery. Well, "get into it" might be a bit of a stretch, but I decided to give it a go. Why…? Why not…? Trying something new, especially something that seems to hold the same poised cadence of shooting a free throw, watering a garden, or going for a mindful walk, sounded appealing to me. Archery seems to embody that same skill set—like shooting a free throw—where it doesn't matter exactly how you do it or what your form looks like. As long as you stay relaxed, calm, patient, and consistent, there's a good chance you'll end up going in the right direction.
After buying a new bow and arrows, I turned to YouTube, trying to gather all the “how-tos” a novice bow shooter could find. Out of all the videos I've seen and the advice I've gathered, the one that stuck with me the most was from a man who said, “It doesn't matter how you shoot, just do what feels most comfortable for you, and do that over and over again.” He then showed two releases back to back. “Which one is right and which one is wrong?” he asked. One looked wrong at first glance, while the other seemed properly right. He went on to say, “Either, as long as you stick with it.” That seemed very zen to me.
Find that video here.
2. Nuance
What does spirituality mean to you? I'm curious about your personal definition, not Google's, not your parents', not your spouse's. Is this a loaded subject for you? In psychology, there's this idea of “separating topics into individual parts.” Often, a subject can seem convoluted, and without further exploration, it might get labeled as “good” or “bad” at face value. But with deeper investigation (typically in therapy), we begin to see that it's not so black and white.
For example, you might ask yourself, “Is it spirituality that makes me uncomfortable, or is it the people who have forced beliefs on me that I didn't truly believe in?” A note to remember: in my experience, when something is forced, aversion often follows. It tends to be unsustainable in the long run.
As you go into this week, I encourage you to start separating things into their multiple parts in various aspects of your life. Instead of saying you do or don't like something (which can be black-and-white thinking), challenge yourself to think about the aspects you don't like. What specifically about it bothers you? Then, consider the parts you feel indifferent towards. And finally, what aspects might you actually like? Dare I say.
In my opinion and experience, this approach creates more nuance, more shades of gray between the black and white. It aligns with what Carl Rogers might consider more “fluidity,” a quality he describes as “essential to the human who is becoming.”
3. Whose Values Inspire You?
My cousin just got back from Memphis and shared his moving experience of visiting the Lorraine Motel. It reminded me of my visit to a museum in Detroit, which also left a deep impression on me for different reasons. This got me reflecting on pivotal figures in history who have moved me over the years. Naturally, I got curious about those who might have inspired you. This feels like a soulful and heart-connected topic of conversation.
Reflecting on this reminded me of my time in India and learning about Hanuman, a Hindu god who is half-man, half-monkey. Hanuman is revered for many reasons, but one piece of his story that stands out to me is his devotion to his king, Lord Rama. Hanuman stood by Lord Rama devoutly, following his commands consistently and without faltering. Because of this unwavering devotion, he was granted superpowers.
Take from this what you will, but I find something beautiful and powerful in Hanuman's devotion. His story continuously reminds me of my values and the importance of staying devoted to them through thick and thin, without faltering. Thank you, tiny Hanuman statue, for reminding me to meditate today.
4. Challenge Of The Week
Influence yourself somehow in these four areas:
Self
Health
Spirituality
Relationships
I challenge you to try one new thing that may make you smile physically, or in your heart, in each of these four areas. I’m curious to hear what you find.
